We had a moment! Maybe one of my favorite of Tate’s life thus far…

My husband, Tate and I were sitting on the couch the other day, looking out the window and yanking on the blinds (Tate), and trying to keep Tate from falling off the couch when we tickled him (Mommy & Daddy). A fun moment in its own right, I’ll admit.

Then I asked Tate, “Can you give Mommy a kiss?”. And sure enough, he just leaned in and planted a big wet one right on my mouth. I couldn’t believe that he had understood- that I am “Mommy”, what a kiss is, and where a kiss goes! I tried again: “Can you give Daddy a kiss?”. Yep, he took a step over and gave Dad a kiss too.

Okay, like most parents, I think my child is a genius. On further reflection, I realize that his understanding, or at least his obedience, is rather selective. For example, he doesn’t “understand” when I say “Don’t bite Mommy!”. 

But back to the sweetness. He’ll always give kisses on request (I try to restrain myself), but also chooses to give them out at random moments. Like when we were reading our Who Loves Baby?  book that has photos inserted, and he just leaned down and kissed the picture of his cousin. Or sometimes when he cries in the middle of the night, I go in to pick him up for just a minute. He lays his head down on my shoulder, then switches to the other shoulder and back again, trying to get comfortable. Then suddenly I realize that he’s stopped in the middle, giving me a kiss right there in the dark.

Oh, my precious almost-a-year-old baby, please don’t ever outgrow this!

What have your children (young or old) done to make your heart melt?

Photo Courtesy:
oskay

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One of my friends and former co-workers at MagnetStreet, Melinda, has just announced that she is pregnant with her second child. That means her daugher will be a big sister! Since this is uncharted territory for me, Melinda was kind enough to answer a few questions:

How did you tell your daughter that you are pregnant?
We actually told her the day after we found out. We told her that there was a baby in my belly and that she was going to be a big sister.

What was her reaction?
She was so excited! She loves to help out with any baby she sees, especially her baby cousin.

Has she said any cute things about the baby?
Because I have not been feeling the best, she asks me all the time if my tummy hurts. She asks if I need to eat or need some water. If I say no thank you, she “tickles” my arm to comfort me (this is what I do to her when she is hurt or tired). She also kisses my belly thinking that this will help me feel better. She is extremely sensitive and wants me to feel better. I think the funniest thing is when she says that there is a baby in her belly. She lifts up her shirt and sticks out her belly, then proceeds to say that she wants the baby to come out. We are not going to address that topic yet!

What are you most excited about for her as a big sister?
She is a wonderful little helper. She will be right there with me and the baby the entire time. She has a nurturing heart and a love for babies that I want to encourage in our household as we grow our family. I am also glad that she’ll be almost 3 when the baby comes and old enough for me to reason with. She’ll be more independent at 3 also.

What are you most nervous about?
Because she so loves to help me, it may get overwhelming at times. I know that it will take patience on my part to try and establish what she can help me with, and what things are just for mommy and baby. 

What did you learn with baby #1 that you’ll apply to baby #2?
The thing that I learned from having our daughter was to just let go!! Life does not have to be that complicated! As long as everyone eats, sleeps and gets a bath once in a while, we will be doing just fine! I feel like we will be more relaxed this time around because we have been through it once before. We will kind of know what to expect, although I know that every baby is different and it could all get thrown up in the air, but at least I have a point of reference now! 

Has this pregnancy been at all different from your first?
This pregnancy is a lot like the first pregnancy. I am sick, tired, and this time around I cannot just take care of myself (what a bummer)!!!

What is your favorite sibling birth announcement?
I like these sibling birth announcement designs for either a boy or girl. I’m not sure whether I’d choose magnets or linen paper. (Melinda’s husband is a photographer, so their announcement is sure to have some fabulous pictures of the new baby and the proud big sister!)

Thanks, Melinda! I know many of you readers have more than one child – any advice to offer to Melinda and her husband, before the baby arrives?

Photo Courtesy:
sgillies
Dan Harrelson
Matthew Routley

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First things first: Panera Bread is offering free coffee and samples of their new breakfast items tomorrow- Wednesday, January 28. Thanks to Freebie Shoppe for the heads-up!

Officially, however, I’m not drinking coffee anymore. You see, when I had the flu a few weeks ago, I decided that avoiding caffeine was a small gift I could give to my miserable stomach. Which meant that I had caffeine-withdrawal headaches in addition to the rest of what ailed me.

I think you could say that caffeine is the last socially-acceptable addiction, whether your drug of choice is Diet Coke, Mountain Dew or good old coffee. I’m not the classic “I can stop any time I want” addict, though. For whatever reason, my body is fairly sensitive to the stuff- I generally have only one cup a day, but if I haven’t had that one cup, my head is aching by noon.

So now I’m trying to stay off the sauce. In the back of my mind, I’m thinking that I wouldn’t have to go through the withdrawal whenever we’re ready to get pregnant again. (I know you can have some caffeine during pregnancy, but I prefer not to, and last time I had a total aversion to the taste anyway.)

But oh, how I miss my coffee! It’s my happy thought in the morning, especially when Tate wakes up earlier than I would choose. I roll out of bed knowing that we’ll make our way downstairs, pick up the newspaper off the front steps, make some coffee for me and slice up a banana for him. It works on so many levels- the fragrant aroma, the warmth of a mug in my hands, and the pop of energy that gets me to the point when the sun has risen to join our day.

Decaf is giving me two out of those three, with the energy burst sorely missed. I think I have it figured out that I can occasionally have a cup of the good stuff if I go 3-4 days before having another. I think tomorrow might be one of those days- Panera here we come! 

Would anyone else like to confess to an addiction that helps you be a happier parent?

Photo Courtesy:
samantha celera
faeryboots

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Every parent has days (weeks, months?) in which a little extra help would be greatly appreciated. What if you suddenly had a nanny, a housekeeper, a personal chef, or maybe a good magician to make all the stress go away? As I browse through other blogs this morning, I realize how many forms this “need for help” can take.

Mother-2-Mother just wrote about Adwai Malual, a new mother of quintuplets. She’s from the Sudan, and because her husband’s job currently keeps him there, he hasn’t even met his babies yet! This happy but exhausted mom has many financial/material needs right now- click on the link above if you’d like to help.

With just one child, I’m more often bored than overwhelmed, although I’ve certainly been struck with the latter as well. On those “I can’t read these books or play with these toys one more time” days, a change of pace is best. Sometimes we bake something (doubly good because it results in yumminess!) or go visit my grandma at the nursing home. I can’t wait for it to be warm enough again for long walks- to the park, to the library, to Target. (Although my husband would prefer that I not go to Target when I’m bored.)

Another great source for fun is Play-Activities. Melitsa, mother of two boys, and a former teacher, is committed to developing creative, interactive play resources for parents and children (age five and under). You can even sign up to receive a play idea every day via email. Some of the things are totally new, and others are just new ways of thinking about what you’ve done before- like different ways to play with blocks or to read books. Great stuff!

For a really bad days, this list from Extra(hour)dinary Parenting will now be taped to the inside of my cupboard door. (She recommends bookmarking it, which is also a good idea, but my bad days usually involve the internet being down, so I choose the low-tech backup!) These are simple but super ideas and reminders. My favorites are:

#11: They are only little for a little while. 

#13: What dramatic thing can I do to change up everyone’s mood? Make a pillow pile? Drape sheets on the table to make a fort?

#15:Do I or my kids need food, water, or a change of clothes to feel better?

What helps you, when you need help?

Photo Courtesy:
John Morton

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Tate woke up today with absolutely vile breath. Not at all reminiscent of the delicate, white flower often found in rose bouquets! Admittedly, my sense of smell is much stronger since pregnancy, or as Shannon at Rocks in My Dryer said: “It is an occupational hazard of motherhood that you leave behind the diaper days with a wickedly strong sensitivity to smell.” But still, for someone with a fairly bland diet, this was unexpectedly bad!

With a temperature of 18 degrees outside, I didn’t feel like an early-morning trip to Target for baby toothpaste. I tried to Google homemade baby toothpaste with no luck. Did find a guilt-inducing link at Homemade Baby Food. Apparently I’m supposed to be wiping down Tate’s teeth at least twice a day. I do wipe them off during his bathtime, occasionally…every two weeks for sure. When I get his first toothbrush, it should be replaced at least every 10-12 weeks. Wow! My husband and I are lucky if our toothbrushes are replaced once a year (even though extra brushes are waiting in the closet).

Eating breakfast didn’t help, drinking lots of water didn’t help. He’d probably love a piece of gum, but that doesn’t seem particularly safe. Hopefully the situation will have magically corrected itself by the time he wakes up from his nap. Otherwise, who’s got a great baby-fresh-breath tip for me?

Photo Courtesy:
DRB62

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Just a few weeks ago, a friend sent me photos from one of my baby showers last year. Wow – I forgot how big my belly was! It’s funny to think back to that time when I didn’t know Tate, didn’t even know whether he was a boy or a girl. I was so thankful for my showers, not only for the gifts that helped us prepare for baby’s arrival, but for words of encouragement and wisdom from others.

Each guest was invited to share a piece of mommy advice. When my mom offered the reminder that children don’t like it when mom is on the phone (and thus not paying attention to them), one of her friends agreed, sharing that her son had actually cut the phone cord in two!

Remembering what a special event that was for me, I’m really excited about the new shower invitations at MagnetStreet Baby. They’re pretty and modern, and best of all, customizable for your favorite mommy-to-be. Change the colors to her favorites or to match the theme of the shower, if you want.

This design incorporates a photo, which could be either a cute snapshot or an artistic professional shot.

Browse online through all the shower invitation designs, in a variety of sizes and styles. Shower in style!

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When Rachel named her baby Emma on Friends, my friend Sarah screamed at the TV. You see, she had loved the name Emma since she was 16 and knew that just as she was reaching a child-bearing phase of her life, it would suddenly be everyone’s favorite name. My other friend Sarah reserved Leo and Lily years ago, letting her family and friends know that they were off limits.

I didn’t have names picked out ahead of time, unless you count when I was 7 or so…I was fascinated by Bill being a nickname for William since it didn’t start with the same letter, and likewise Bob for Robert. I wanted to have twins named Robert Bill and William Bob. For further comparison to my 7-year old mindset, when I grew up, I wanted to be a waitress and play professional basketball on the weekends.

Fast-forward to 30-year old Kara, trying to choose baby names for her unborn child. Admittedly, I overanalyze things, but a name is a big deal. I love that my name is unique, but people constantly mispronounce it as “care-a” instead of “car-a”, including both my high school and college graduation ceremonies. So we were hoping for something that had an obvious pronounciation. Then there’s the meaning of the name, the initials, what it rhymes with and possible nicknames.  

Given those constraints, I went through the entire 20,001 Baby Names book without finding anything that both my husband and I liked, for a boy OR a girl. Nothing! Then came studying a family geneology book, listing everyone on our high school basketball and track teams, and brainstorming every Bible name we could think of. Still nothing. I had always thought picking names would be fun, not stressful!

Getting a little desperate, I started scanning everything that had names: movie credits, football game programs, even tombstones at the cemetary. I made myself take a break for a couple of months and then slowly went through the 20,001 book again, considering whether any of them could possibly work. For a boy, I liked Tate. After a few weeks of subtle convincing, my husband also liked Tate. We chose Allen for a middle name, the same as my husband and his father. (Our girl name is still a secret in case we have a girl someday.)

Even with all of our efforts, when we called our family to announce Tate’s birth, most people thought we said “Kate”. Proud Dad quickly adjusted his message to “It’s a boy, his name is T-A-T-E, Tate”. We also didn’t think of the nickname Tater-Tot ahead of time, but that was applied by his uncles within the first 24 hours- fortunately, I think it’s cute! Overall, I think we made a good choice and I hope our son will like it too!

How did you choose names for your children? Are you in the name-choosing process right now? Share your story!

P.S. Just found a great post at Belly to Belly-Button with links to lots of baby name sites!

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Do you ever watch the Weather Channel? My husband is into the weather, so I just happen to know that they have a feature called “local on the eights”, in which local weather is reported when the time ends with eight, like 5:18. The current weather is shown in text format, and a computerized voice reads it aloud. For the last two days, the report for our area has begun with this phrase: Bitterly cold.

Shouldn’t the Weather Channel be more objective, less emotional? It’s rubbing salt into a wound to have a computer disparage the place where you’ve chosen for your family to live. But of course they’re right. After the brutal introduction, the report gives details such as “high of -3, windchill -55″. Ridiculous!

I’m somewhat oblivious to the outdoors, however, as I haven’t been there in the last three days. We have been experiencing our first round of Family Flu. Tate’s had it the worst, and without going into graphic detail, I’ve done quite a few extra loads of laundry.

Let’s just say that I would like to more or less retract my post about early-morning grocery shopping. Last week I felt all mom-like for getting up early to run errands…ha- that was nothing! I’m not one to get sick very often, but in previous bouts, I was free to curl up in a ball and sleep until I felt better. This time I’m entertaining a baby whose crankiness reveals that he’s feeling about as good as me. Not that I’ve been going it alone- my husband and I have been taking shifts, watching Tate while the other one sleeps. Still, my “personal on the eights” would be: Utterly miserable.

One of my friends said the best parenting advice he’d been given was to remind himself that “this too shall pass”. So that’s what I’m going with, and as of this evening, we seem to be past the worst of the illness. Even better, the forecast for next week is in the thirties! Hooray for our family, hooray for Minnesota!

Photo Courtesy:
somma1977

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Last year, my husband and I brought our new baby home from the hospital on Valentine’s Day. A pretty good way to celebrate love, I’d say! Is your due date fast approaching, or do you know someone whose is? There are adorable new Valentine-themed birth announcements that you have to see. Here’s a sneak peek:

Even if your baby isn’t brand new, consider this: One of my good friends sent out valentines to family and friends last year, instead of Christmas cards. What a great idea! Everyone loves getting a valentine, and I’m sure it was easier for her to pull together a photo and letter in January/February than in the midst of all the other holiday activities of December. Dress the family in red, snap a great shot, and share the love!

I had a very “mom” moment yesterday, and I wasn’t even with my son.

Let me back up a little…Tate’s general pattern is to go to sleep at 7pm and wake up sometime around 6am. I nurse him for about 20 minutes and he sleeps another hour or so before we’re up for the day. That feeding is a half-awake one for me (awesome tip from my friend Lindsay: put a travel pillow around your neck if you sit up for nighttime feedings – SO comfortable!). After Tate falls asleep, I hold him for a few snuggly minutes, amazed at how big he’s gotten already, sad that we won’t always have these shared morning moments, and very happy that I get a little more sleep.

Yesterday, however, I spent most of the 20 minutes arguing with myself. Because I was hosting book club that night, my to-do list included grocery shopping, final house-cleaning and cooking dinner. Plus we’d been invited to visit a music class in the morning. It seemed wisest to get the grocery shopping done after putting Tate back down, while Dad was home- not only would I be able to start cooking as soon as we came home from class, but shopping alone would be much easier.

But no, my body argued, you could get more sleep, your bed is warm, remember the flannel sheets?! You know how they show a little devil and a little angel over someone’s shoulder when they’re trying to make a decision? Mine was the mom and the not-mom. The person who has a bundle of joy helping to dictate the day’s schedule and the person whose time is their own.

“Mom” won. And as I braved the frigid cold in the pale light of morning and entered a nearly empty grocery store, I suddenly felt like my mom. She often did the shopping at 5am, which I’ve always attributed to her being a morning person. It suddenly struck me that she’s not THAT much of a morning person. But she had FIVE (wonderful, amazing) children, which means every day probably had a crazy to-do list and grocery shopping was an ordeal that I can’t currently imagine.  

Anyway, the shopping got done along with everything else, and book club was great as always (tim tam slam for dessert). Also, I learned that the lines at the grocery store are very short when you’re there early in the morning!

Photo Courtesy:
nyki_m