In the last Pregnancy Decisions post, we heard about Allison’s decision to stay at home full-time with her daughter. Today, we’ll hear from Lisa, another former MagnetStreet co-worker. While she is also a full-time SAHM, her choice was made after her son’s birth and after she had returned to work.

1. What issues did you consider in deciding whether to return to work?
One of the biggest issues for me was childcare. It is hard to think of someone else taking care of your child when you are working. Plus the cost of childcare can sometimes outweigh the paycheck. 
 
2. Did you make your decision before or after your child’s birth?
I was originally going to go back to work on a part time level. My mom and sister were going to be my sole childcare providers at little to no cost. After returning to work for a few days, I realized that this was not the best scenario for me or my family.
 
3. Could anything work-related have changed your decision? (higher salary, flexible hours/days, at-work childcare facilities, etc.)
I think that the hardest part for me was the inflexibility of the work hours. I had no window for error in arriving or leaving work, and this left the decision very easy – my family comes first. I think that flexibility or at-work childcare facility would have changed my mind slightly but, all in all, I am VERY happy with my decision to stay at home.

4. Were others supportive of your decision?
My family, friends and co-workers were very understanding in my decision.

5. What have been the positive aspects of this decision for your family?
I love being at home and sharing in all the memories with my son and now with a new one on the way, I can’t imagine being at work, even part-time. It has allowed me to be involved in what is happening in his life and allowed me the freedom to give him the best of me.
 
6. What are the challenges for a parent at home with children full-time?
Obviously, the biggest challenge was finances. With two full time salaries, is it very easy to manage but cutting down to one salary was a bit of a leap for us. I think what most women don’t realize is that is can be done, but it takes sacrifice. So maybe you don’t have an amazing cable TV plan, or cable at all. Maybe you start to cut coupons, or maybe shop at a thrift store but the sacrifices that you make will be so minimized by the joy you receive.

7. What advice do you have for parents who have decided to stay at home full-time after the birth of a child?
If staying home is the decision that you want to make, don’t care what anyone else says or thinks. Also, don’t let finances be the determining factor. Remember to get creative- don’t be afraid of garage sales or thrift stores. Try to see how little you can spend at the grocery and still make good meals. Downsize if necessary to a smaller house or mortgage, buy a cheaper car…whatever sacrifice you make will be worth it!

Thank you, Lisa! Are there any others out there who had a change of mind after their child’s birth? Either deciding to stay at home or the other way around, deciding to go back to work after all? I’d love to hear about your choice, in the comment section.

My husband’s family has been attending the same family camp in Colorado for over 30 years – what an amazing tradition! This was my second time there, and Tate’s first. Many of the families go the same week every year, so there are long-term relationships. It’s fun to hear stories about my husband as a teenager from his friends there, especially as they’re all now bringing their own children to camp. 

I was pregnant last time, in the exhausted first trimester stage, so napped a lot, went to bed early and didn’t do too much hiking. This time I was looking forward to a lot more activity, but uncertain as to how that would work with a 17-month old.

Horseback Riding at Family Camp

My worst fear was being stuck in the basement playroom all week while the rest of the camp was off hiking, fishing, and playing games. Thankfully I had a little attitude adjustment before we left, remembering that a normal day for Tate and I is more or less in a playroom. This one, though, would have new (to us) toys, and be in a beautiful mountain setting with family and friends all around. Plus, someone else would be cooking our meals and doing all the dishes!

The other great thing about family camp was the opportunity for all three of us to be together. At home, it’s pretty common for one of us to take care of Tate so the other can run an errand, get some sleep or just have a break. With a full week together, no “to do” list, and help from grandparents we were able to enjoy family time and even some time for just mom & dad.

Tate loved being around all the other kids, especially his cousins. He seemed to really grow up in just a week. The playroom was indeed a big hit, but so were the pool and waterslide, bowling, and hikes in the stroller (go BOB!).

Do you have a family camp tradition? How does your family get away from the daily grind?

This is the 101st post for Notes on the Nest! The milestone kind of snuck up on me, in the midst of a busy month. Thanks for your patience in my lack of posting. After a week of family camp, the BlogHer conference, and a family reunion, I’m now unpacking, doing laundry (okay, I’m only thinking about the laundry) and deep-cleaning most of the house.

Not because I’m that much of a clean freak, but because the whole main floor had a thin layer of sheetrock dust. Due to a plumbing fix upstairs, we’ve had a gaping hole in our dining room ceiling since I was pregnant with Tate. We finally decided to have it patched up while all three of us were out of town for the conference. So the ceiling looks better, and now we’re doing cleanup…

In celebration of my repaired ceiling, an almost-clean house, and 101 posts, I’d like to offer you (and anyone with whom you’d like to share) a 20% discount off of any product at MagnetStreet Baby. You’ll find birth announcements, shower invitations, baptism announcements, birthday invitations and more. Just enter the promotional code NEST20 when you place your order - it’s valid until October 31, 2009.

And because posts are always more fun with photos, here’s Tate signing “more”. He’s telling you that there will be more posts coming soon: our travel adventures, a BlogHer recap and new voices in the Pregnancy Decisions series – stay tuned!

We made it, we survived! Our first airline flights with Tate were a success, defined as no meltdowns for child or parents!

Thank you for all the great advice you offered in the comments of my Travel Tips Needed post. Being that it was a shorter flight, we didn’t need a movie, although the laptop was ready to go. Opening presents was the biggest hit – there were books, Matchbox cars, a pair of sunglasses, stickers and animal crackers. On the return flight, he loved watching the videos from our trip on my digital camera.

My flight attendant friend, Sarah, suggested bringing a wide variety of snacks, which were also very popular. Our lovely Delta attendant gave me both peanuts and cookies, without my even asking. She also gave Tate a really cute “First Flight” certificate, signed by she and the captain.

I’m SO glad that we brought the stroller, as several of you advised. The long walk to our gate would have been reason enough, but he also fell asleep in it while we were waiting for our rental car. Well worth it, and a nice way to transport some carry-on luggage as well.

I bought an animal backpack/harness from Target, although I only used the leash part for about 5 minutes. It was still worthwhile as a distraction – he loved snuggling the monkey and making “ooh, ooh, ooh” sounds.

A few final tips: One that I learned from the Flying with Kids site is to ask the flight attendant which bathroom is best for changing diapers. Ours advised us not to use the one towards the front, as it was much smaller. Another, from my friend Sonya, is the site SeatGuru.com -simply select the airline and plane type (listed on your ticket confirmation) for a heads-up on which seats/rows are good or bad.

Our next travel adventure begins in a few days, as we’re off to Chicago for the BlogHer conference. What is normally a less-than-seven-hour drive will certainly be longer with Tate. Any roadtrip tips for me? Please?!

Most birth announcements feature a photo of the newborn baby, right? But there could be many reasons to want an announcement without a photo, such as:

• You’ve won a million free prints from Snapfish/Shutterfly/Kodak and just need the announcement to show the baby’s name, stats, etc.
• You’re a famous musician/actor/politician and want to protect your child’s privacy while still sharing the news of his/her birth
• Your kid just isn’t that cute (Okay, that would be the lie if we were playing Two Truths and a Lie. Of course your kid is cute!)

Whatever your reason might be for wanting a birth announcement without a photo, rest assured that MagnetStreet Baby has something for you! Here’s a sampling of the designs, featuring beautiful graphics and fonts to make your big announcement in style.

Your friends and family would rather meet your baby in person anyway, right? You can’t snuggle a birth announcement after all…

Check out all of our non-photo birth announcements online.

The topic of returning to work is really a series within a series, because there are so many angles to it. The first is whether you’ll stay at home full-time or go back to work. If you are going back to work, will it be full- or part-time, and the timing of your return is an issue to consider as well. And for a lot of people, what seemed like the right decision before and during pregancy ends up not working once the baby has actually arrived.

I’ve found some great outside resources for these decisions, that may be helpful to you. One is a post by Laurie at Expecting Words, in which she lays out important considerations: money, identity, sharing responsibilities and career flexibility. Stay tuned for more links as this series continues.

Now, I’m happy to introduce Allison, one of my former co-workers at MagnetStreet. She made the decision to stay at home full-time with her daughter, born in July 2007.

1. What issues did you consider in deciding whether to return to work?
Mainly finances, I knew I would be a stay-at-home-mom if I had a child, so we just had to get our finances in order to make it work.

2. Did you make your decision before or after your child’s birth?
The choice was made before even considering getting pregnant. It is something that I feel strongly about for myself, and I didn’t want to enter into pregnancy without having the plans in place to stay at home.

3. Could anything work-related have changed your decision? (higher salary, flexible hours/days, at-work childcare facilities, etc.)
Not really at this time. Eventually I would like to become a birth doula when I feel that I could leave my family for long stretches of time.

4. Were others supportive of your decision? 
All family and friends were supportive. I would say a lot of co-workers were surprised, but still supportive. There were a few women having babies around the same time that seemed a little sad that I was able to stay home and they weren’t.

5. What have been the positive aspects of this decision for your family?
For the three of us, it just works best. I love being a constant for my daughter every day.

6. What are the challenges for a parent at home with children full-time?
The initial adjustment is so hard, for all first-time moms… every single moment of my life was different. The days can be long and boring and challenging (now that I have a two year old… ahhhhhh), and there are no sick days or vacation days.

7. What advice do you have for parents who have decided to stay at home full-time after the birth of a child?
If you hate it some days, you are normal and that doesn’t make you a bad mom. Have other people to talk to, people you can be completely honest with… Remember that the days are long, but the years do fly by.

Thanks for sharing your story, Allison! I’d love to hear from other stay-at-home moms in the comments section – answer any of the questions above, or share your own thoughts.

We’re going to family camp with my husband’s family this month. It’s in Colorado, and this will be our first flight with Tate. I’m a little nervous…

He’s just so rarely willing to sit still, and doesn’t seem to ever fall asleep in our arms like in his younger months. So I need your help- what are your best tips for travelling with a toddler (17 months)?

I was really excited about these travel activity packets from Ohdeedoh until I realized that they’re for slightly older kids. If that’s what you’ve got, they have options for ages 3-5 or 6-8.

An idea that will work for us is from Susan Willis, writing at EZines: bring some new toys, but go the extra step and gift-wrap them. I’m sure the extra time it will take him to open them will be well worth it!

How about this tip for sanity, or at least a laugh, from Flying with Kids: “Wear spunky clothes and dark glasses so that other passengers think you are someone famous enjoying quality time with your kids.”

I’m planning to get some sort of leash/harness for the airport. Should I also bring our stroller- would it be worth the hassle, and do I need to check it?

Anything you can tell me will be greatly appreciated, even if it’s something that did NOT work for your family!

Photo Courtesy:
Ma1974

From our family to you, Happy 4th of July!

We had lunch today with my grandma. She’s in a nursing home, and the food is generally awful. So sometimes Tate and I bring over a little McDonald’s picnic to have in her room. She loves the Bacon Ranch Chicken Salad and I had a Snack Wrap today. I justified getting a medium size fries for myself instead of small, telling myself that Grandma might want a couple. Mr. Picky Eater doesn’t know what he’s missing, and only wanted carrots and bunny crackers.

I would have taken another picture with them smiling, but my camera battery died. Really, they’re enjoying the picnic!

Tate can’t say Great-Grandma, so my aunt had the idea to call her Gigi, as in G-G (for Great-Grandma). It was a genius idea, because he can actually say Gigi, but hasn’t yet mastered Grandma.

Tate loves to visit Gigi, and everyone there loves to see him. We went down to the main floor to look at the birds they have in a little aviary. While we sat there, not one but two different people (and not older, confused people) asked me if his curls were natural. Really? Like I curl his hair every morning? Or gave him a perm?

But my favorite part of the afternoon was as we were leaving, I asked Tate if he wanted to give Gigi a hug. He did, of course, and snuggled right into her. Then I asked if he wanted to give her a kiss. Again, yes, and he leaned in for a smooch.

Then he did the fingers-together sign for “more” and gave her another kiss! Then another sign and another kiss. She was tickled and I was cracking up. What a little lover!